Karl Marx

Karl Marx, social philosopher, writer and founder of modern socialism and communism, author of Das Kapital, The Communist Manifesto, and the Tales of Peter Rabbit, is one of the Hivemind's most respected figures (except by Sam... but we all know that's just a facade and he's Secretly A Marxist.) Marx's life and work was closely tied to that of his "friend" Friedrich Engels, who lived in a building just across the road from where Joe currently lives. Marx and Engels wrote the Communist Manifesto together, and did an awful lot more together. TVTropes would probably describe them as "Heterosexual life partners." Or would it?

Marx and Engels
At 3am one morning, deprived of sleep, the Core Hivemind of Joe, Drew, Ben and Lorna had one thing on the brain - slash fiction. They decided that the tension between Marx and Engels could not go unresolved, and there had to be a slashfic about them. They decided to write it three words at a time, and what followed was this masterpiece of modern literature, quoted here in its entirety.

''"Karl Marx was writing one day, about the proletariat, when Engels appeared naked as a naked mole rat, and said, "Karl, I will enter. Prepare yourself! ...also, I love communism almost as much as your bulging manparts." Stood up, quivering, Karl blinked at him. "...I'm heterosexual. :|" "Oh." The End."''





Status
Marx is currently recognised as one of the three most important people ever to have lived, along with Theodore Roosevelt and Charles Darwin. Together, the three of them are the only people on Earth capable of grasping the true nature of the Doi.